For pretty much my entire life, I’ve had this dream or this “plan” to someday get married. And these days, it seems like society has made it to where if you don’t have a boyfriend or you aren’t pursuing to get one, then you must be at the bottom of the totem pole. And for the longest time, I bought into it. I felt as if there must be something wrong with me if I did not have a guy in my life. I am always the one at get togethers who doesn’t have a guy on my arm or one popping up on my phone with a text message. I’m always the one in my close group of friends who doesn’t have a boyfriend, and alot of the time, it bothers me. And I always hear everyone say “it’ll happen when it happens” or phrases like that. and its always been in the back of my head, but I never fully understood. I’d go back and forth about it with God, being content with being single, and then I’d be in a situation and feel weak and fall into that place again. I never truly got this until now, but God has just given me new light on this. God has a plan, a perfect plan, that obviously doesnt include a guy in my life right now. The scripture tells us (Psalm 37:4) that God will give us the desires of our heart, my worry has always been “will I ever find a boyfriend? will I ever get married? will I ever have kids? etc..” And a very good friend of mine once explained to me, that God puts those desires in our hearts for a reason! He a has plan and if those desires are not in His plan, He will change our desires! I believe that whole-heartedly! So, for now my desire is to get married someday, and God is going to fulfill that desire (when he sees it fit) or change my desire.
"And don’t be wishing you were someplace else or with someone else. Where you are right now is God’s place for you. Live and obey and love and believe right there. God, not your marital status, defines your life. Don’t think I’m being harder on you than on the others. I give this same counsel in all the churches."
-1 Corinthians 7:17, The Message.
This spoke so loudly to me! I am right where God wants me to be. This is his place for me right now, and someday that will change, could be 6 weeks or 6 years from now, but until then I need to stop dwelling on “not having a guy in my life” and focus on my prince, Jesus Christ. Someone once told me, singleness is sacred. And I’m realizing they’re right!
1 Corinthians 7:32-35 says, "I want you to live as free of complications as possible. When you’re unmarried, you’re free to concentrate on simply pleasing the Master. Marriage involves you in all the nuts and bolts of domestic life and in wanting to please your spouse, leading to so many more demands on your attention. The time and energy that married people spend on caring for and nurturing each other, the unmarried can spend in becoming whole and holy instruments of God. I’m trying to be helpful and make it as easy as possible for you, not make things harder. All I want is for you to be able to develop a way of life in which you can spend plenty of time together with the Master without a lot of distractions"
And, now I see that so clearly. God isn’t punishing me by keeping me single, he is giving me the ultimate gift by giving me time to just be with Him before I am no longer single. and I have to remember that in those “weak moments” when I just really want a boyfriend. I am so thankful for a God who loves me THAT much! Being single really is a gift from God, and more people need to cherish that, inlcuding me. So, from now on I will no longer see being single as me being not worthy or a punishment, I will look at it as a precious time in my life, that I may never get again, so I need to take FULL advantage of it, by “simply pleasing the Master" He needs to be my main worry and focus. :)
Isn’t God just amazing?